Don't struggle alone
As humans, we live in the Maya of distraction, comparison and judgment. We are constantly comparing ourselves to others, and the media doesn't play fair. We are shown images of thin, fit, "perfect" bodies – but in the eyes of whom? 300 years ago, those images were larger, rounder, fuller versions of a body, and thin wasn't "in" – it meant hungry and poor. So what changed? Medical definitions for one, of course, but so much more than that affects how we see our bodies, and what our individual—yes, it's uniquely ours—definition of healthy depends on our body alone.
Last week in my coaching session (even coaches have coaches!), my dear mentor asked me "how do I feel about my body?" And a lot of deep, sorrowful emotions came up, reminding me that this is still, after two decades of work, an area I still need to (and may always need to) focus on. As a woman who's been sexually abused, raped, and bullied, this work may never be done in this lifetime. But I can mark progress, awareness, and self-care as success; making sure to allow the emotions to move through me, and let them go back to the light, as they aren't mine, they're just part of the illusion of this reality.
My coach and I revisited the tools I know to use but don't. Right? How many of us know what to do and how to help others heal, but forget to do that for ourselves until the issue comes to an ugly, rearing head.
Those tools are:
✎ Messages - Mantras - Awareness
Messages around the house to remind me, "I have a body," "I honor my body where it's at," "I love my body," "I am okay, I am safe and I am loved," and "What are you thinking?" The last is my personal favorite, to just bring awareness to the thoughts that bubble up through the mind, because we have 80,000 of them a day, and 80% of them are negative – often more about ourselves than anything else. But the rest of the messages are there to help reprogram the tracks that aren't mine. To have awareness around what I say internally, and reword that if it doesn't suit me. Sometimes, when it feels hard to say we love our bodies, we can just start with "I have a body."
✎ Self Care and Vehicle Maintenance
Self Care – taking time for my body, to do the right things it needs, to think of it like the temple it is, and feed it the fuel it needs to be healthy – and to NOT feed it the emotional food that just fills the void. Also taking time to move it, clean it, and treat it like the vehicle it is. We are not our bodies, we are the soul spark inside of them, but if we want to inhabit this earth for as long as we do, we must take care of the one and only vehicle we get for this incarnation.
✎ Spiritual Connection and Honor
Flipping the script from the negative can be easier if we choose the spiritual route. Having a spiritual connection with our bodies can be as simple as saying "My body is a temple. I choose to respect," and honor the body like it's your church. Pay it the same respect you do a sacred space, and it will shift your love, respect, and honor quickly.
When we unite as a collective to commit to honoring this for each other and for our children, we can shift the old narratives that are outdated and hurtful. So if this resonates with you—to commit to shifting this narrative about body image and what a healthy body looks like, send me a message. I'd love to hear from you.
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